even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
