Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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