ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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