Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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