he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
