How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
