I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Watching her eat just hurts me
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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