Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
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