8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Randomize