I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
only if we run a train.
done.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize