And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
