There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
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