eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
This toilet bowl is my home.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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