5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Randomize
