question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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