They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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