Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
