I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
