garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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