just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
