We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Randomize
