I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I am mentally ready for anal.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
