just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
