I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
