If i come over, it means nothing
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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