Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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