we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
