how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
