this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
