when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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