Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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