Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize