There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
