Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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