she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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