Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I forgot wine drunk hurts
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
