SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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