Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
