thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
