i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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