U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
