A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
