did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
