Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize
