She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
