shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
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