I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
