Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Randomize
