PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
