IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
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