i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I touched a dick in church today
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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