do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
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