I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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