I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
